Saturday, March 12, 2016

Not Who They Say

For many months now, stories have filtered to me through various sources, regarding my own personal character.  These stories, I know are not true, and I usually shrug them off and move on with my day.

Now that things are finalized between my children's father and myself, though, I feel like I have more liberty to be frank about such things, and for those of you out there who are hearing things, or have brought things to my attention, or perhaps may run into the sources of such information, I would like to give you the truth.

I am not who they say I am.  No, the many mistruths that my former husband and his boyfriend are spewing about me.. they're just that- untrue.

A few of the main stories are as follows:

I cheated on him.

This is outlandish.  He is the only man I ever so much as passionately kissed, let alone other things.  I am 32 years old, and I have been with him alone since 2002, after meeting him in 2001.  The unfaithfulness was on his side.

He sees the kids all the time.

He may be seen with his friends' children, possibly, but for anyone to state he is with his kids at all, actually, is a lie.  He hasn't been in their presence since last July.  He willingly chooses to avoid contact with his own children...

I will not let him see his children.

This one really gets me, because I have put forth so much effort trying to locate him.  I tried every avenue, plead and means of communication to get him to call, write, email, or text them, let alone see them.  I've wanted nothing more since they were born for him to spend as much time with them as he possibly could.  So, when you hear that, I assure you, it is not true in the slightest.  Even now, I have tried to contact him to let him know that I still would like for him to be in their lives and have some sort of visitation worked out so that they would know and not forget him.

I am going to keep my kids from their extended family.

While I would have the perfect excuse to pull my children away from their family on their father's side, seeing as how cleanly he severed himself from our lives, I have never thought to do that.  That is cruel, not only to my children, but to their extended family, whom I have had in my lives for 15 years now as well.  While I may not have been making it a huge priority to travel and visit family, because most live hours away and I am the only parent providing for the children.  I haven't had the opportunity to visit my own family much in the last two years either without their assistance.  That said, if his family wishes to see the children, they know that they can visit, and I have never been a jerk about it.  The more regularly they see and interact with my kids, the better, I think.

I am crazy and/or making this all up.

I am sane. I am rational. I've been as calm as a person can be through all of the muck I have been drug through. I have proof of everything that I claimed in the divorce papers or that I have made known to anyone I have talked to personally, or written online.  I may love to write, but my life story, although it sounds a bit like a psychological thriller at times, is accurately represented.

I am sure there are more, but those are the main ones or the ones that I have been confronted with  most often.

I know, this blog post is not something I typically write.  But, now it's out there, so hopefully if and when anyone hears anything, they can just point the source to this post, and the truth is there.  Perhaps, someday, the lies about me circulating will stop.

Now, a cute photo, taken almost a year ago.  I can hardly believe how much they've grown since this last happy holiday they had with their dad.

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